I am to have a surgical procedure.

 

I am at the hospital or MD office for a standard prep several days before the procedure.  I am on a gurney and fighting to prevent the prep from proceeding.  They are at the point of restraining me.  My mother is angry at me for making a fuss and can't see the big deal.  My father just wants to get it over with.  What is the prep?  A clitorectomy.  Finally a nurse states it isn't necessary to do this; that there is another way to prep.

 

The alternative is to be catheterized right then and stay that way until the procedure, meaning I'd have to work, etc, with it in place.  My parents again are upset at my reaction. 

 

Finally the medical staff agrees to wait until the day of the surgery.

I am in Italy with my brother who had AIDS.  Some of my family is there as well, but distant and uninvolved.  I am the only one helping him out.  I am wearing something like a sari which winds around loosely to  make a sling which falls around my knees.  I am walking a very long distance, darrying hin to the  hospital.  He slips around in the sling, several times falling around my knees.  I try walking like that, but I kick him with my shins and I can't really walk.  When I try to rearrange how I am holding him, I have difficulty; his head bounces back roughly, I almost drop him several times, jounce him roughly.  He says nothing.

 

I arrive at the hospital and lower him to the ground in order to register.  I realize he is dead.  I start to grieve.  He is taken away to prep for burial.  Later, it is realized he is still alive, but they plan to go ahead with his cremation this same day, assuring me he will not feel it. 

 

We are taken to the local Buddhist temple/place of burial.  There are prayers and chanting outside with his body there; there is another service indoors.  After this, he is taken away.  On the way out, I pass a small room, almost like a closet, where I see him being shrouded in a heavy blue tarp with a vinyl surface.  He is being sewn  into it.  I realize that he will then be taken to the crematorium.

 

Later, the family witnesses with me his remains being  buried in an 'oven' grave in a fence around the temple.

 Apologies to the blogger who wrote this for not putting any name or reference..... 

Quote

Ordinary Can Be Awesome

Are you aware that everything in life can be nourishing? Everything can bless us, but we've got to be there for the blessing to occur. Being present with quality is a decision we are invited to make each day.

It is said that Spirit is not only found in holy places, prayer and meditation, yoga and retreats. It is everywhere; in your relationships, your work, your daily chores, in nature ... to be experienced if you are willing to connect deeply with your environment.

In being open to connect with something, you open to its essence, its purpose and meaning. There are other dimensions of reality below what we normally see and hear. So, let yourself open to the mystery.

We live in world deities, but most often holiness comes wrapped in the ordinary. There are burning bushes all around you. Every tree is full of angels. Hidden beauty is waiting in every crumb. Life wants to lead you from crumbs to angels, but this can happen only if you are willing to un-wrap the ordinary by staying with it long enough to harvest its treasure.

Have a nice day

 

 

I found this wandering around the virtual globe and really enjoyed it......and wanted to share.